MommyCoddle

She sews

Christmas gift-giving was a real challenge for me this year. Even up to the last few days before the holiday I was scrambling for ideas.

I was feeling like my kids didn't really need anything. We have plenty of toys. The baby is drowning in three sisters worth of hand-me-downs. Their rooms are totally messy which makes me even less excited to go out and buy more "things" to add to that chaos. 

But my kids aren't quite at the age where they appreciate a hive of bees or a goat. 

Ideally I like to have one "winner" gift. Something that will thrill their socks off and then pepper the rest of the gift-giving with little things like books, underwear, chapstick and pencils. 

Finally at the very last minute this year, and thanks to an in-store phone call to my sister, inspiration arrived. 

For Mary, it was actually easy--she's been begging for an (inexpensive) digital camera since the first hint of holiday decorations started appearing on store shelves. (So that's like, what? October?) And for her slightly absent-minded personality, she's handled the responsibility impressively well. The camera still works AND she knows where it is. 

But Emma was a challenge. She wanted a horse-y Christmas and had things on her list like an indoor riding arena (Lord, help me.), and jockey silks. (They aren't cheap!)

She also had on this on her list at number 10: That Birdy will stay little forever.

Be still my heart. She immediately got extra points for that one. 

So, as I was standing in the local Feed Mill staring at hay racks and shedding blades, nothing was inspiring me. 

But in a desperate phone call to my sister and a "What are you getting your kids?" conversation, I hung up the phone with a plan. 

My girl was ready for her own sewing machine. 

If you've caught any of my whining around these parts, we've been without a sewing machine in this house for almost three years. I've been borrowing and begging which is no fun. And Emma loves to sew. 

Even with my majorly budget-minded Christmas, I was still able to get her a very basic, entry-level Singer. 

I've never really given Emma specific sewing lessons. She knows the basics and nothing more. But watching her navigate the creative sewing waters is exciting.

It's like when toddlers first learn to dance. The minute they start to bop to the beat, you don't whisk them off to dance classes. There is so much creativity and growth in them learning how to swing their hips and bend at the knees. They're way more creative and free without the boundaries of proper dancing technique. 

And I'm finding the same to be true with Emma's sewing. I know she knows enough to be safe. She knows that if she doesn't want her stitches to pull out she needs to do a little back-and-forth at the beginning and end. But otherwise, she is a blank slate behind the presser foot. The possibilities are endless. 

I know that eventually what she wants to make will get more complicated and some instruction will be required. 

But for now, my house is peppered with tiny hearts, miniature pouches and endless possibilities.

The dining room curtains and pleated skirts can wait....

7 Tips for taking a perfect family Christmas card photo

1. Take your photograph when your children are well-fed and rested. (Not right after church when the baby is looong overdue for a nap and everyone's low-blood sugar is resulting in impatience and grumpiness.)

2. Make sure your husband is well-fed. (Because you'll need his help to wrangle babies, arrange children, shoo chickens, and hold ponies. And if he's hungry {see above}, he'll give up on your perfect holiday photo shoot way too quickly.

3. Find a clean, white pony to add something unique and meaningful to your family's photo. (Preferrably not one that was rolling in her muddy field just as you are all walking outside to take pictures.)

4. Make sure your children are well-groomed and bathed. (or else they'll be wearing handknits in all the pictures to cover up)

5. Drain all tubs of standing water. (Because you know the baby will find them. And while you're directing the brushing of the pony and making sure noone gets stomped on by the same nervous pony, the baby will find the water and be up to her elbows in it before you turn back around.)

6. Lock in the chickens. (They distract the photographer.)

7. Remember that one of the things you love most about your family is that it's big, crazy and chaotic. But every once in awhile, you get a glimpse of almost-perfection. And there among the five hundred wacky outtakes, there'll be one that captures just that. 

 

jiggetty-jog

Hello.

I have ten minutes to write this post. I'm sitting in the play area of our brand-spanking new Wegman's grocery store. Birdy and Elizabeth are happy at the train table, Mary and Emma are just a few blocks away, having their piano lessons. I was supposed to have more time sitting here to write and enjoy the free wifi, but I got bogged down in the toothbrushes when all I really needed was a gallon of milk and a pound of coffee beans. Isn't that always the case?

But I'm determined to be here this morning. I've opened up the "compose" window every day this week. 

I'm home from New York City. It was a fantastic weekend. I was so glad to have my mom with me. We had such a fun time together. Navigating train stations and taxi fares. We dealt with overwhelming problems like where to have lunch and which store to shop in first--Purl or Fishs Eddy (thanks, Erin for turning me on to that one!) She lounged in the hotel room, and dined leisurely in the hotel restaurant, while I zipped from premieres to broadway. Tough weekend, huh? 

I ate the best dessert I've ever had. Would I ever think I'd use the word orgasmic on my blog, let alone to describe a dessert? No, but there. I just did. It was. And now I'm blushing.

The movie was fantastic. One of those movies I really need to see again to take it all in one more time. To see it without seeing it through so many tears. Woah, the tears. It's a killer. I was a bit bummed that it doesn't seem to be one for younger kids (I was hoping I could take Emma). It definitely falls in the young adult category. Or it would make a great movie to see with your husband. There's lots of animal drama. That's tough for children. 

I also got to step inside the home of my great-great grandmother. A beautiful tall, narrow townhouse on banker's row. Now a preserved landmark, nestled between highrises just like The Little House. Today it serves the unromantic role as a store front full of discount name brands. I'm not sure what my great-great-grandmother would say about the five foot square poster of a teen dressed in short-shorts and fur, dangling from her living room wall. I was scolded for taking pictures inside the building. But I explained my history and was given full photographic access. 

Going away was wonderful, yes. I felt a bit like my life was on hold until I got the trip behind me. Now, I'm really looking forward to settling in for the rest of the advent season. I'm ready to slow the pace down a bit. And hunker down. 

So happy weekend friends. Here's to slowing down and enjoying the rest of the season. 

It's good to be home.

 

 

A warmer heart

I've got a new sidekick when it comes to morning chores. 

I can't even utter the word "outside" unless I have her completely bundled. Otherwise, I'll be attempting to dress, shoe and bundle a baby squirming and wailing at the mudroom door, eager to break free from her indoor jail. 

Some days, we can't even be bothered with shoes. I'm lucky if I can get a sweater over her head and a hat secured under her chin before she's pushing through the door. 

She often brings her morning banana. I try not to think about where and how many times it is dropped. And what bits of dirt and whoknowswhat that cling to it. Or which animals she's offered a lick before taking another tiger-sized bite off the end. 

Instead of lugging her on my hip, we've discovered the garden cart makes a pretty convenient way to trek back and forth to the chicken coop. 

I put her on the concrete pad in front of the coop while I work.

She sits in the pile of chicken feed like it was a sandbox created just for her. The hens eye her cautiously, pecking around her, as she tries to feed them from her chubby palms. This must be why the hens follow her around so closely. They know she offers food.

I collect eggs, check on the babies, freshen up water, and throw clumps of soft, fresh green grass into their pen. 

When we cross back over the little wooden bridge on the way home, she is thrilled by the water running under our feet. I'm amazed at her ability to perch on the very edge of the bridge, crouched down, babbling at the water. I miss that kind of flexibility and balance. She's telling me a lot of things about that little stream. I talk back to her like I understand every word. 

Eventually, I convince her there's more to see on the other side of the bridge. But before she hits that slippery, muddy patch, I swoop her up and plop her back in our farmer's stroller. 

Her favorite friend blocks our path with a croquet ball in her mouth. A leaf dangles from her lips. She's relentless. 

If I'd let her, she'd stay out here all day. The only way I can coax her back inside is to bring the dog and a small furry kitten with me. She finally follows, waving goodbye to the crowd of animals gathered around her, like the queen of the animal kingdom.

I peel off layers, wipe her runny nose and notice her muddy sleeper-feet. And she's gone again. Disappearing into the belly of the house. Following the dog. Calling for her sisters. And I'm left to hang up sweaters, shove hats back in the basket and pry the barn boots from my feet.

The house feels warmer now than it did when we first set out this morning.

So does my heart.

snack break #15

Since my children are on snack break number fifteen of the day, I figured I slip over here to share a few things with all of you while they're stuffing their faces with cheese, grapes and nutella toast. 

*If you sneak a peek at my top right sidebar, you'll see a new little button--I have been nominated over at Parents.com for Best All-Around Mom Blog. And I'm holding steady with my one vote that nominated me. Have a moment? Will you click on over and vote for me? 

Or click on the button below:

By Best All-Around Mom Blog

*First of all, a question: Can someone please tell me what to do with my lovely lavender up there at the end of the season? Cut it back? Let it go? I generally go with the "do nothing" plan, but I love it and I'd love to see it thrive despite my ignorance.

*I'm over on 4Kids or More talking about marking time with family portraits.

I feel like it's been awhile since I've shared some good stuff from blogland. I've been a pinning fool lately. Are you on pinterest? (Make sure you let me know in the comments!). It's one of the most inspiring time-sucks on the internet. 

Recently pinned:

*Mariah Bruehl has a great list of online learning resources and inspiration for children on her website--categories like nutrition, music, math, art, child-safe online searches, writing, organization...great, great lists. 

*I think my kitchen could handle a Big Chill.

*Emma's been asking me to teach her how to "type for real". Dance Mat Typing might be just the thing.

*This feather bangle is beautiful and budget-friendly.

*I really need this Crumpler. Badly. Because as much as I love my KellyMoore bag, I'm not that fancy every day. Sometimes, I just need to throw my DSLR into my every day bag and know it won't get smashed among the diapers and bunny crackers.

*These pillow case cushions for kids are pure + simple genius. 

*I had a plastic version of this in fifth grade. It was my most prized possession atop my school desk. 

*We have serious ponytail holder issues in this house. As in we can never find any. This is an excellent idea.

*And for dessert? Make your own magic shell. Be still my heart (or stomach....)

Goodnight, Irene.

Oh my. Hello from the long-awaited land of lights that turn on, toilets that flush, washing machines that hum, water that runs from the tap. 

Hurricane Irene hit us at 2am last weekend and by 3am, we had lost our power. By 7am, trees were still falling down, even after holding out so long through the storm. 

It was an adventure at first. So fun! So exciting! We're like pioneers! 

I had written this fun little post in my head highlighting all the great fun we were having on our adventure:

Haha! The outfits Elizabeth has been putting together when she can't find clothes in her dark bedroom!

Haha! Look at Birdy playing in the puddles!

Haha! She's so dirty! She's having such a good time!

Haha? I don't have a way to wash those clothes!

Haha? I just ruined those cute leggings!

Haha? I don't have a way to give her a bath!

By Tuesday, it was no longer fun. 

Tuesday night (I think it was Tuesday. At this point, it all becomes a blur.), we hit a low point. Little Mary was suffering from a migraine. A doozy which was accompanied by throwing up (haha! towels I can't wash!). It was pitch black in the house. Birdy was toddling around, tripping, banging herself about, screaming. Dan went to turn on the generator that had been powering our freezer, in order to at least turn on a light....Nothing. Broken. No generator. All children exhausted, crying. (I know you mamas know what it's like when ALL your children are crying simultaneously.) Mary, still sick. Grumpiness. Yes, there was much grumpiness. And all in pitch blackness. 

But you know, I believe, now that I'm on this side of it, I can probably pull a little light from this darkness. 

We talked to and helped our neighbor more in the last week, than we have in the last month. 

Driving through developments, I saw more children outside playing, than I think I ever have. It was like spotting some rare, endangered species on the side of the road.

I met neighbors up the road, that I've never even seen before. Standing outside, one lady holding her glass of wine, talking to the neighbor in his flourescent yellow tshirt--the mark of a county roads man, talking to the old man, unshaven and a little greasy (aren't we all?) whose suspenders hold up his ratty old khaki pants. And me. All of us laughing about how tough it's been. Talking about what we've done to survive.

And I thought, "We can do this. When we're put to little tests like this, we can all be pretty tough and pretty resourceful." That's not to say I didn't have my moments. That one morning, I decided to just crawl back in bed and hide for a few minutes (or maybe it was an hour). 

But we survived. We can be tough. My husband, toughest of all. We can haul water from the stream to the toilets. And take our showers in the freezing cold spring-fed pool at my granparents' farm. And eat a lot of cereal. And figure out a way to make chocolate chip pancakes even though there's no electricity.

We can do it, if we must.

But still.... hello. And still....it's good to be back.

So, so good.

I'll probably regret this...

But, it's Friday. And I have a million things to do. And an impending school year breathing down my neck. And mountains of laundry STILL from vacation. And dishes in the kitchen sink. And a messy house.

So, what's a girl to do? Why, make silly movies on her iPad of course! 

And FYI, there's a fan blowing on us (not good for sound quality).

And we are flopped on our tummies on my bed (not good for keeping both faces in the frame of the movie). 

So, with apologies to Adele and Taylor Swift....from the depths of procrastination....

what's a mom to do?

It's getting to be that time of year when we're really due for a little back to school schedule and regularity to our days. The way this is becoming most clear is in the amount of sibling bickering and pestering and picking that is going on in this house. 

My oldest is at an age where she waffles between wanting to be "all grown up", independent, aloof, and in the next moment right in the thick of the play with her younger sisters. And often those transitions can be awkward and bumpy. Everything is "so annoying", so much so that I think I am going to be banning the phrase from her vocabulary very soon. (this afternoon!)

But honestly, it's the bickering that really wears this mama down. There is no manual to motherhood and I find my own self waffling between "approaches" as well. I so desperately want them to learn to work it out themselves, to stand up for themselves, to let the little sibling-picking slide off them like water off a duck's back. I want them to learn to walk away and not be bothered. To maintain their cool. 

I don't want to always be the sounding board, the complaint department where you come to file your grievances. 

But I also have to help them work through some of these things. It's hard to know when to step in and when to step back. 

And so, this is how I know school days must return. These brains need reviving, rejuvinating and stretching. Energy needs to be expended, but in the right direction.

This school marm is sharpening her pencils. 

radio silence

Hello friends. 

I'm going "radio silence" for the week. It is hard to wrap my head around the fact that August is here already and summer is winding down. So I'm taking this week to plunge into summer and maybe even do a little pondering about plans for the Fall. 

Have a wonderful week. Happy Summering.

more soon....

molly

this morning

This morning the girls slept in after a late night at the farm welcoming home the honeymooners.

This morning there are fresh flowers from the garden on my kitchen table, brought in by my husband.

This morning Emma is at the barn, learning that sometimes your responsibilities come before play.

This morning, there is a breeze coming through my kitchen window.

This morning there is homemade jam and soft butter.

This morning I am kind of looking forward to a day of laundry and clotheslines, tidying and dishes.

This morning, there is a young rooster testing out his new-found voice from the side yard.

This morning, everyone is home and heading to the stream to cool off. 

This morning was just the morning I needed.

 

something more

Last night we had cereal for dinner. It's that hot.

I started out with grand plans for a summery dinner, but after the few minutes of standing over the stove, dripping in sweat, miserably hot children whining to swim, sticky baby crying to be fed-- I decided enough was enough. 

It was the best decision I made all day.

Today, I write from my spot in the kitchen, the fan blowing directly onto my face. No oscillating. Just full-on breeze. 

We're in a two-day stretch of heat advisories and record-breaking temps. I'm watcing the hourly forecast again. I just need to know how much longer I have to survive. 

But this morning, despite the fact that the temperature inside the house is about the same as the temperature outside of the house, some work still had to be done. 

Normally, I pretty much hustle through a lot of these tasks. But this morning, the chant in my head was to slow down. My motivation was to stay cool, but I noticed the slowing down also began to change my state of mind. 

I'm often racing to accomplish the things that are just a part of my every day routine. As if there's something more or better or more important awaiting me. But most days, this is the better. This is the more. This is the more important. 

I can't believe I'm uttering these words, but today, I'm kind of grateful for this heat wave. For the forced slowing down. For the reminder to relax the pace at which I move through my day. Because these tasks and routines and the people I do them for, are my something more. 

why we have children

When I got home from exercising last night, I was met at the door by Mary :

Mary : Do you go to the Arena Club to lose weight?

Me (weighing my words carefully, wanting so much to protect them as long as I can from every body conscious thought ) : Well....I go there to exercise.

Mary : Oh. Because boy! Do you ever look skinnier! 

And that, my friends, is why I have children.

Did I ever tell you that Mary is my favorite child?

(Emma, if you're reading this, I'm JUST KIDDING.)

In light of THAT good news, here's some other goodness from around the web...

✽  Kristen Chase interviewed me about homeschooling on The Pioneer Woman

✽  Scratch Baking Co.'s Baker's Notes Issue No. 1 : bagels!! my weakness.

✽  Miss Moss : Farm Fashion ( via amanda ) : I want to look this good chopping wood. (cue my husband's laughter)

✽  Soulful Mothering with Tara Thayer : I'd like to carry these words around in my pocket

✽  Dandelion gone to seed : the anticipation makes you hold your breath 

✽  morning light : I favorite all her kitchen pictures

✽  These shoes, in green.

✽  Grapegruit Sangria (do you have a good recipe for red or white? Share?!)

The weather is sticky here again. The three H's of summer : hazy, hot and humid. Once the baby wakes up, we're headed to the pool! Happy Wednesday, friends!

a recipe for sweet relief

Prepare yourself. Now begins the season where I need to discuss the weather constantly. Good-bye Maryland Spring, hello Maryland heat and humidity. We obviously have no air conditioning in this little gem of a farmhouse. I find myself relentlessly checking the weather, the weather maps, the hourly forecast, hoping for a break in temperatures, a drop in humidity, a good strong storm. (And dream about slipping off to an air-conditioned condo in the city. I've said that before, haven't I ?) 

So we learn to make-do and deal with the heat. 

As little Jane Fonda here can attest, it has been pretty wicked the past several days. I'm in survival mode. I'm not above a sno-cone break in the middle of the afternoon. Cereal for dinner when it's too hot to cook or even eat. 

But one good thing that has come from this recent heat wave is my adaptation and (near) perfection of my grandmother's iced tea recipe. 

You must know that the rule in my grandmother's house was that you had to be 13 to drink the tea. It has twice the caffeine and all the sugar, so you practically need a license to drink it. But a glass of that tea, full to the brim, overflowing with ice, is enough to momentarily keep even the worst hazy humidity at bay. 

Now my grandmother had 15 children. Her version of this tea was brewed on the stove top, and poured into a giant stainless steel pitcher in her industrial-sized refrigerator. With the constant flow of children (over 13), visitors and guests, she always kept two pitchers going at the same time. 

Well, my family, with only 2 of-age drinkers, doesn't quite need the same volume of iced tea. 

I also didn't want to boil water. I'm that lazy in this weather. And I wanted to see if I could make a small concentrated version as my starting point. 

So my recipe is your recipe. You can thank me later. 

ICED TEA FOR THE OVER 13 CROWD

Fill a quart canning jar with cold water. 

Add 3 large tea bags. ( I generally use Lipton and the bags I used are the jumbo-sized ones about the size of your palm. But any bag will do, you'll just have to tweak the amount.)

Screw the lid on the jar, securing the bags and set in a sunny spot outside.

Let your tea get a good sun tan. No really, a long steep is critical to this tea. I put mine out in the afternoon and bring it in the next afternoon. Almost a full 24 hour steep. You want it nice and dark.

Remove the bags and dump your tea concentrate plus 2 more quart jars of cold water into a pitcher.

Add 1/2 cup of sugar

Add a generous 3/4ths of a 12 ounce can of frozen lemonade concentrate**

Stir well.

Get a large glass of ice, a sprig of mint and thirst be-gone!

**I hate to waste that last little bit of lemonade concentrate in the bottom of the can. Dump it into your quart jar, fill it up with cold water. Put the lid on and give it a good shake. And take it out to your husband--who's dripping in sweat while chopping wood for WINTER!

someday is here

I hope my mother will weigh in on this, but seriously, can we discuss this picture? I found it when I was going through oldies recently.

This picture was taken at a 4-H meeting that was being held at our farm. The memory still fresh in my brain.

There were people present. People outside of our family. I was in public!

I was standing in front of the 4-H club, seething with jealousy that I wasn't old enough to be a member like my brother and sisters.

I knew I needed a way to be part of the night, to draw some of that focus back to me. I needed drama. What I needed was an attention-grabbing demonstration. I remember the topic I settled on had something to do with how to (ahem), remove a horse's head. (My eldest daughter might disown me if she caught wind of this.)

I remember that stainless steel bowl was full of grass, to serve as a distraction for the horse before head removal.

And of course, one needs a knife to handle this job. A butter knife, of course.

I remember gathering the supplies in the kitchen snickering under my breath at what a comedic genius I was. This was gonna be good!

But mom, can we discuss my outift? The tube top? With my white baby belly hanging out? Were you done fighting battles for the day? Did I sneak off and put it on without your knowledge? Was it so hot that night that you were concerned I might sweat through a normal-sized tshirt that covered more than my upper torso?

I was definitely getting attention. I'm thinking it was for the shirt, not the morbid demonstration.

Funny thing is, I find myself in the trenches of this battle, too. Maybe not tube tops, but I've been known to be seen in public with small children in striped skorts pulled up over jeans with polkda-dot tshirts and wool sweaters. Ballet tutus. Tall black rubber barn boots on the hottest dog days of summer. Children who look like they've been pulled from the pages of a Little House story versus the 21st century.

I can hear the "someday you'll understand" refrain in my head. And I smile at my 6 year-old self. And I give a knowing nod to my mother. Someday is here.

the list of three

If I were honest with myself, my daily to-do list would be impossibly long. There are so many things I'd like to accomplish in a day. I oftetimes look around my house and see hours upon hours of jobs that need to be tackled, projects I'd like to attempt, corners that need to be cleaned, drawers that need to be cleaned out.

The reality is, I don't have time for everything. I don't get up with the sun (much to my husband's dismay). And on most days, I've got these four little people who keep following me around the house demanding things of me.

So I've learned that it's all about priorities. And figuring out what's really important.

And I've learned that I need to keep my to-do list extremely short. Because it will fill itself up on its own, even if I haven't written everything down.

And so each day I confine my to-do list to three. Usually, these are the three tasks that are really nagging on me. The things I see that give me the "Ugh. I need to deal with this." feeling. An email. A pile of laundry. A bill. An errand. A room that I'd be embarrassed for anyone outside of my immediate family to enter.

Three things? I can handle that.

These three things that are nagging me while I do all the other things? Getting those three accomplished and off my list, that feels really, really good for this mama. That I can handle.